Ok so one thing is for sure, you can’t control what other people think about the world and the world also means you!! If you spend your life continuously looking for external gratification then you are in effect doing yourself and your confidence a huge disservice and are very unlikely to actually achieve deep long term happiness.
As I’ve discussed in my other articles true happiness doesn’t come from cars, money, or things. These create short term bursts of happiness but not what I like to call true fulfillment. True happiness comes from a place within. When you are so grateful for even the air that you breathe and you are secure in the knowledge that you are living your life in true alignment with your values and your purpose. When you give absolutely no shits as to what anyone thinks of you because you know you are doing good in this world and are coming from a place of confidence and high self-regard. When you know you will leave this world having made your impact on it and will leave a beautiful legacy for your family to remember you by.
This Addiction Affects Everyone, My Friends!!
When I finally discovered my purpose and decided to start writing and to create Mum Warriors I was held back so badly by the fear of what others might think.
What if they think it’s not a good idea??
What if only 3 people join my community?
What if it fails?
Then I gave myself a huge bitch slap across the face and said
‘listen here Lindsay Nash your purpose is to help as many women as you can re-gain/gain their identity after becoming mums and to guide them to a place of greater self-confidence and higher self-worth in order to live their best lives and be the best role models to their children’ …….’ so even if you only help 3 women then you have achieved your mission and the ripple effect on that family will spread like a wave’……… ‘oh yes’
I said to myself…
‘sorry for listening to my silly monkey mind’.
So, what is your purpose? and do you have the right to take that away from yourself or the people that you will give great value to because you are scared of what insignificant people say about you?? No you don’t, so let’s try and work this shizzle out!
So How the Heck do I Stop Caring so Much about What Others Think I Hear You Ask??
Ok, so I’ll start by saying it’s not easy my friend but it’s sure doable. It takes time and practice and won’t happen overnight. Only around 10% of people can master it so I dare you to try and learn this very significant skill when it comes to mindset and leading a happier life. It’s also another great skill to pass down to those kids of yours.
Can you imagine having a teenager that is so confident in their own self that they don’t care what their friends and others think?? No, neither can I but it’s worth a go. I certainly wish someone had tried to teach me at a young age.
The best way to start to combat the fear of what others think is by taking action!! If you face the fear and do it anyway you are telling your thoughts that you don’t care what it is they’re telling you and you begin to create new thought patterns. So start small. Get uncomfortable and start doing.
Remember… if you’re never facing criticism and never taking action outside of your comfort zone then to put it simply YOU ARE NOT GROWING AND ACHIEVING.
Another step to take is to stop letting yourself down!! If you say you’re going to start a diet, get up earlier, read more, work out etc then DO IT!! Because when you say these things to yourself and don’t do it you actually let yourself down and subconsciously your mind knows it can’t rely on you so it relies on others for gratification. In other words when you start becoming reliable to yourself and showing up for yourself you start building confidence within. Internal integrity. This makes a HUGE impact on how you see yourself and the need for outside approval lessens.
Most of what you think people say or think about you is garbage. With that garbage you are then fueling your limiting beliefs, and it enables you to then make up excuses as to why you shouldn’t do something or say something. Basically you’ve just told yourself a lie and allowed yourself to go back to your comfort zone where the monkey mind is the most secure.
By cowering away from negativity (perceived or real) you are actually walking away from building your dreams and walking straight into a life of mediocrity. You are letting yourself down and your children down and you will go to your grave with regret. No one remembers the person that didn’t live their best life because they were terrified of what others think and stayed in the shelter of safety. Legacies are built by showing courage, tenacity, determination and grit!!
So Now Go my Friend and Start Showing Up For Yourself
Now my friend I know you have all of these amazing qualities within you and have a talent and a purpose that others would hugely benefit from. So I dare you to go and shine in the world. Put your ear plugs in. Put your blinkers on. Don’t look left or right; only forward and see what the universe creates for you.
I believe in you.
Get out of your own way and go and live an amazing life!!
Thanks for reading. If you resonated with this post then please show me some love on the socials and subscribe to my blog and I will send you a free PDF with a 7 day step by step guide to start building self confidence and regaining your identity.
Lots of Love and Courage